Holy Thursday. It was not necessarily filled with all the
holy things this Catholic girl could have been doing. I got side-tracked with a whole lot of last
minute shenanigans before we leave tomorrow.
As Irish-accented Carroll O’Connor said in the movie Return to Me:
“I’m blessed with work.” That was the
way of it today. Gracie and I hit the
ground running, with appraisal appointments, dropping her off at Uncle KC and
Auntie Jenny’s, arranging Easter baskets, (shh) another great appointment, and
then lots of busy things. It’s not like
Jim and I are big-time travelers; it takes a lot of actual thinking to make it
all come together. Then I had to clean
the whole house because God forbid I run the Boston Marathon with a dirty
house! (I can’t escape it. I am wired like my mother. xo)
On the surface we appear to have all
our important stuff packed and I’m going to go with that otherwise my head will
explode. Then we were able to slow down
for just a minute, walk over through the soft, spring darkness to the church
for a visit to Jesus on this night of remembering when He was imprisoned. It is very hard to get my mind to slow down
right now, but as I came into the silent chapel and knelt down, my prayer was
an instant and interesting one.
I talked to God my daddy, Abba, and
told Him I don’t want to be separated from Him over the next couple of days. I tend to forget about God when there are a
lot of bells and whistles going off around me.
I am a child easily distracted. And
I don’t want to do that. I want to hold
my Abba’s hand through this whole experience.
He is the one responsible for getting me here, and I don’t want to leave
Him behind. Another news flash: It isn’t about me! And I don’t want to experience the next few
days without Him!
These thoughts fully filled my heart
as I then sat there beside my husband and we prayed and the tears came. This whole week the tears have been
coming. I have been going to morning
mass this week and I sit there and cannot believe how much Jesus is heaping on
the grace into every bit of me right now.
I had prayed early on in this journey for Him to heap it on: “Give and
gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and
over-flowing, will be poured into your lap.” (Luke 6:38)
I am so overwhelmed by the prayers
being said for me, for the graces given to a daughter who can never earn them,
nor ever deserve them. I can feel the
graces. They are so strong within me
that they bubble up and come out my eyes- in the form of such happy tears. I am so profoundly grateful, am feeling so
much love for God, imperfect though it may be- on so many levels that I cannot even
form it all into words.
On this special day when Jesus, at
the very end of His earthy life instituted the sacrament of the Holy Eucharist,
I just want to sing out once again that I have found it. In all my searchings and struggles; I have found
the Pearl of Greatest Value. My Jesus,
my All, in the Blessed Sacrament. For
me- He is everything.
And finally, to put it all into
proper perspective I saw a face book post to my wall from my friend and
neighbor Mandy. It was her dear husband
Kirk who died just a short time ago.
She will be at home instead of making the trip to Boston like they had
planned together. She posted:
Wishing you a good run! Enjoy every minute, high five every little kid on the street, cheer with the students at the top of the hill! Celebrate all that you have accomplished to get to Boston! I'll be cheering for you! Please add your miles to Kirk Steen, Boston when you are done!! Can't wait to hear all about it when you get back!
Look up! It's springtime!
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